Things I have learned today:

When you have laryngitis, it does more harm than good to whisper.  Try to talk with your voice, or don’t speak at all.  The latter is preferable.  My PA-C suggested a small white board.  That I do not have, but I do have about three trillion (give or take a dozen) partially-used spiral notebooks.  And slightly more pens.  The combo works just fine.

When you have to communicate with your seven-year-old via the written word, you can’t use your usual cursive-printing-hybrid scrawl.

Or substitute ‘w/’ for ‘with.’

You can, however substitute ‘@’ for ‘at.’  Thank you, internet age.

Even though I do a large majority of my communicating via e-mail and IM, there are still some things one needs a phone for.  And, if one is not connected to the Telephone Relay Service, a voice.  (e.g. Elementary school Safe Arrival Lines.  Oops.)

Short of having one’s mouth wired shut, it is probably impossible for an extremely verbal person to assist a ten-year-old with his homework without talking.

Friends and family are extremely helpful when they hear you croaking (literally, not euphemistically) over the phone.

Pharmacists can be very sweet and helpful when you present them with a sheet of paper that says, “Sorry, laryngitis!  Do you have…”

Both seven- and ten-year-olds respond quite well to being clapped at and whistled for.  This discovery, I believe, has definite training possibilities.  My future daughters-in-law will thank me, don’t you think?

When you communicate with children via expression, note pad, and hand gestures, they will be tempted to respond only in nods and grunts.  Hence, this page, which I’ve referred to several times this afternoon:

(The first page was quite neatly written.  That went downhill, and fast.)

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